Thank you @Renea for the Kofi.
Xie Lin only maintained this action for a short while before quickly realizing himself that this behavior was inappropriate. The person across from him, who already didn’t much like paying attention to him, would very likely tell him to scram in the next second.
“Sorry, forgot you have germophobia.” Xie Lin let go of his hands.
The word “germophobia” also woke Chi Qing up.
He suddenly realized he didn’t seem to have any reaction.
He did want to pull Xie Lin’s hands away, but it wasn’t like before, where he felt uncomfortable because someone touched him. In the past, no matter what form of contact it was, as long as someone got close, his entire body would stiffen, and he would feel an uncontrollable repulsion.
But just now, other than feeling it was sudden, he had no other thoughts.
Even in that instant when his ears quieted down, he felt as if he had found a sliver of breathing room.
Xie Lin saw the medicine box sitting on the dining table from afar: “Have you taken your medicine?”
Chi Qing was feeling irritable and gave a perfunctory “Mm.”
“Still saying ‘Mm,’ you haven’t even poured water,” Xie Lin looked at the completely untouched kitchen, finding no signs of water being boiled, and there was no mineral water on the table either. He walked to the edge of the dining table and casually flipped through the medicine box. They were all new. “The packaging isn’t even opened, what kind of medicine did you take?”
Having gotten a moment of respite, Chi Qing barely mustered the mood to answer Xie Lin’s words. He said unconcernedly: “It’s expired.”
Chi Qing’s attitude towards taking medicine and seeing doctors had always been unenthusiastic.
Ever since that accident, he didn’t really like stepping into hospitals. If it could be solved by taking medicine, he absolutely wouldn’t go to the hospital; if there was no medicine, he would just sleep it off.
Xie Lin took a spin around his living room. The entire apartment smelled coldly of disinfectant. He highly suspected that this guy Chi Qing was the reincarnation of a disinfectant spirit. Furthermore, the lights in the room weren’t on, causing him to spend half a day straining to look at the medicine box. There weren’t many cooking utensils in the kitchen, but there were many knives. A row of silver-gleaming knives was neatly arranged from large to small, and that serrated knife once used to cut bread was also in the lineup.
Xie Lin said: “Wait here, don’t close the door yet.”
Chi Qing: “?”
Xie Lin glanced at him: “Isn’t the medicine expired? I’ll go see if I have any at my place.”
Xie Lin’s medicine cabinet had a complete variety of medicines. He took out all the cold-related medicines one by one: “This is cold medicine, just take it according to the dosage. In case you have any other complications, I’ll leave these other kinds for you too. If anything comes up, just look for me directly.”
When Xie Lin handed the medicine to Chi Qing, he actually touched his hand, lightly brushing the tip of his pinky finger through the air.
Chi Qing was just about to say, ‘How much is it, I’ll transfer the cost to you,’ but Xie Lin, as if knowing what he was going to say, immediately blocked his words.
“These medicines of mine aren’t cheap,” Xie Lin said. “I won’t let you take advantage of me for free. Treat me to a meal another day. You set the time, anytime works for me.”
“…”
After Xie Lin left, Chi Qing stood by the dining table holding that box of medicine for a long time before going to the water dispenser to pour water.
As he poured water, he stared at the hand holding the glass. His pinky finger was slightly curled, pale as always.
Chi Qing looked at it for a while, and the moment he swallowed the medicine, he thought: Perhaps I really should see a doctor.
“You mean… there’s a situation where you aren’t so repulsed by someone else’s touch?”
The next day, Doctor Wu conducted an online therapy session with Chi Qing.
Although the effectiveness of a voice call couldn’t compare to face-to-face counseling, to Chi Qing, online or offline was exactly the same. His attitude wouldn’t change just because Doctor Wu himself was sitting right across from him at this moment.
On the contrary, he couldn’t even control his current condition himself. If Doctor Wu really sat across from him, how many people were in Doctor Wu’s family, what happened these past few days, what unexpected twists occurred, and how many secrets were hidden in his heart—all this information would be poured into his ears in less than half an hour.
Chi Qing didn’t deny it: “That person came over to deliver medicine yesterday, and I found that I didn’t seem so repulsed by him.”
Doctor Wu’s voice was excited. He felt that perhaps a milestone step had been taken in his treatment of this Mr. Chi: “Could it be that our treatment has had a certain effect? Can you tell me about it in detail?”
Chi Qing also didn’t know how to explain it in detail, and didn’t directly mention Xie Lin: “He…” Chi Qing started, then switched to another pronoun, “That person.”
Doctor Wu caught the keyword: “That person. Is it only towards a specific person?”
Chi Qing was silent.
After a long while, he answered truthfully: “Cannot confirm.”
“Based on my observations over this period, I’ve actually always had a thought,” Doctor Wu pondered as he spoke. “I think perhaps your repulsion towards others isn’t because of the repulsion felt when someone approaches you. Being approached might just be an ultimate manifestation.”
“Of course, I am still not quite clear on what the specific reason is at present.”
“I previously had a client whose case was very interesting. She always had great difficulty talking to people; talking too much would easily make her short of breath. But it wasn’t that she didn’t like talking to people, but rather, as soon as she spoke, she would think of how she looked when her parents punished her for saying the wrong things as a child. Because when she was young, her parents always liked to make her speak in public, hoping she could talk eloquently and show extraordinary conversational skills at parties. But she had always been an introverted child, so she extremely feared such scenes.”
Doctor Wu had been practicing for many years and was indeed very well-researched in the area of “affective disorders”: “So I guess, what you are repulsed by might not be the touch itself, but certain negative impressions brought about by the touch.”
Doctor Wu finally gave his advice: “You can try it with other people around you, to see if you are truly no longer repulsed, or if it is solely just towards ‘that person’.”
That afternoon, Chi Qing recalled Doctor Wu’s words, hesitating whether he should go out today and find someone to try it out on.
Before he even put on his gloves, Ji Mingrui sent over a message.
Ji Mingrui: Are you home?
– ?
– If you are, don’t leave yet. My mom wrapped some dumplings and asked me to bring them to you. I just happen to be running an errand nearby.
Chi Qing hastily scanned it and replied with one sentence.
– The door isn’t locked, just come straight up.
Carrying two boxes of dumplings, Ji Mingrui muttered as he rode the elevator up: “Why is he so proactive in letting me come to his door today? Didn’t he always tell me to visit his place less if there was nothing going on…”
After going up, Ji Mingrui acted like an old mother, helping Chi Qing stuff the two boxes of dumplings into the fridge: “You’ve been moved in for a few days now, I originally should have come see you earlier, but I’ve been too busy lately.”
Ji Mingrui was naturally talkative, and after losing control, the volume of words Chi Qing heard directly doubled: [The case is delayed without progress. After all the original speculations were completely overturned, sigh, it has practically become a mystery case.]
“When I’m done with this busy period, I’ll find you to have a housewarming meal, we’ll cook right here,” as Ji Mingrui spoke, he closed the fridge door. Turning around, he saw Chi Qing leaning against the kitchen door looking at him. His buddy already looked gloomy to begin with, and now staring straight at him, it sent a chill down his spine, making him feel like a fish on a chopping block: “…Why are you looking at me?”
— “You can try it with other people around you.”
Thinking of Doctor Wu’s words, Chi Qing suddenly said: “Come over here.”
Ji Mingrui: “?”
Chi Qing looked at the gap between him and Ji Mingrui, which was wide enough to fit two more people, and stayed silent for two seconds: “Why are you standing so far away.”
Ji Mingrui was completely baffled: “???”
The distance between the two of them was a habit Ji Mingrui had cultivated over these years.
After so many years, he just didn’t dare to get too close to Chi Qing. Chi Qing easily had episodes, and he easily got beaten up.
Ji Mingrui cautiously took a step forward. Seeing that Chi Qing indeed had no reaction, he then took another step forward: “Big bro, you’re acting a bit abnormal today…”
Chi Qing wasn’t wearing gloves, his hands shrunk inside his sleeves. He only brought his hand out a little bit after making ample mental preparation: “Don’t move.”
Ji Mingrui’s head was full of question marks.
Then he watched helplessly as Chi Qing reached out and, with a face full of disgust, tapped his hand: “…”
The distorted voice in Chi Qing’s ears immediately overpowered all other sounds. The complaining voice rang out: [This isn’t something that can be explained by the word ‘abnormal’. I suspect he’s gone crazy today.]
After this tap, Chi Qing quickly retracted his hand.
“This is advice given by the doctor,” Chi Qing, not really wanting to be seen as a madman, explained, “…A kind of treatment plan.”
Ji Mingrui suddenly saw the light: “Then how do you feel now? Did it have any effect?”
Chi Qing: “Feel a bit disgusted.”
Not just disgusted.
His whole body felt uncomfortable right now.
Chi Qing: “You can leave now. Thank Auntie for me.”
Ji Mingrui: “…”
Having finished his test, Chi Qing turned hostile and ruthless: “I’m going to wash my hands.”
Ji Mingrui: “???” There’s no need to be this disgusted, right?
Ji Mingrui: “As bros, using the word ‘disgusted’ is going a bit too far.”
Actually, some parts of Chi Qing’s hands easily turned red; it was an ailment left from washing his hands too frequently year-round. The skin was thin, turning red with just a rub.
After entering the bathroom, he washed his hands twice and dried them as usual. Only at this moment did he have to admit: Xie Lin really seems to be an exception.
An exception whose voice he couldn’t hear, and perhaps precisely because he couldn’t hear it, an exception to whose touch he gradually started not feeling repulsed by.
Just as Chi Qing finished washing his hands, opened the door, and went out, Ji Mingrui’s phone ringtone happened to ring.
While changing his shoes at the entryway, he answered the phone: “Hello? Xiaolan? What’s up?”
Su Xiaolan was currently standing at the entrance of a certain unit building in the Tianrui residential complex. Behind her stretched an extremely eye-catching police cordon line; this was the sign of a scene lockdown.
Su Xiaolan spoke rapidly: “I’m at Tianrui right now. Something happened here.”
The Tianrui complex and Yangyuan, which had been locked down and investigated not long ago, were only separated by a street. The two complexes faced each other directly. At this moment, the street was packed with crowds who had rushed over upon hearing the news. Patches of people gathered in the narrow street, these residents peering into the complex while discussing among themselves.
“A female corpse was found in Tianrui. Also living alone, the girl lived by herself, age around 23.”
Ji Mingrui’s shoe-putting-on movement paused.
“Died last night?”
“No,” Su Xiaolan had just come out from the scene. She clutched her chest, feeling an urge to vomit at the thought of the scene she had just witnessed. After catching her breath, she said, “Died a month ago. The person was frozen in the refrigerator. The landlord has been urging her to pay next month’s rent since last month, but no matter how much they urged, there was no response. Today they brought people over to clear out her things to find the next tenant. But as soon as they opened the refrigerator, they saw that girl’s body.”
