“Meow.”
The cat, which still didn’t have a name, sat hunched by the doorway. Upon hearing noise in the hallway, it knew the owner was coming home. It stretched out a paw and impatiently scratched at the door a few times.
With a “click,” the door opened.
The cat leaped forward, but stopped itself halfway, its paw pads screeching against the floor. Besides the cold-looking owner, the annoying person from across the hall had followed him inside.
The cat: “……”
Xie Lin crouched down to greet it: “Little thing.”
The cat stepped backward: “Meow (Why are you here again?).”
Xie Lin: “If I don’t come over, who’s going to pour your cat food?”
Although Xie Lin still wasn’t the cat’s favorite person, the relationship between man and cat had mellowed significantly compared to before. Sometimes, when Xie Lin walked over to it, the cat would only crack one eye open. Seeing that it was him, it no longer scrambled to crawl from one room to another.
Chi Qing and Xie Lin had stayed at the police station for a long time to give statements following an unexpected incident during their date. They returned home late, missing the cat’s usual feeding time and leaving it hungry for nearly an hour.
The first thing Chi Qing did upon getting home was shower. When he came out, he found the man and the cat having a heated argument in the living room.
The cat: “Meow meow meow.”
Xie Lin: “I went through all the trouble of feeding you, and now you won’t even let me pet you.”
The cat: “Meow.”
Xie Lin placed a hand on the back of the cat’s neck as if to soothe it: “It’s not like I’m going to snap your neck, stop flailing around so much.”
Xie Lin just wanted to pet the cat, but it struggled wildly in his hands. Seeing Chi Qing come out, it slipped away and hid behind Chi Qing’s legs, looking as if it had been bullied.
However, Chi Qing wasn’t the type to stand up for it: “I just showered. Don’t rub against my pajamas.”
The cat: “……”
Chi Qing’s hair wasn’t fully dry yet. He looked down and said that to the cat, then looked up to see Xie Lin: “Why haven’t you left yet?”
After saying it, Chi Qing felt that the sentence didn’t sound like it belonged to a couple at all; it sounded exactly like the bickering he and Xie Lin used to do. He tried to rephrase it: “Do you still have things to do?”
…
That sounded like he was kicking someone out, too.
Chi Qing lifted a hand to grab his damp bangs, feeling a bit annoyed.
He could come up with ten different ways to “kick someone out” without repeating himself, but communicating with someone in a gentle manner was not a skill he was familiar with.
In the end, Chi Qing gave up and said: “Anyway, you know what I mean.”
“Usually in this situation, you could say you forgot to ask me to stay for a bit,” Xie Lin said, “or say that if I don’t want to leave, I can keep you company for a while. It just so happens that I don’t want to leave so early either.”
Chi Qing couldn’t say any of Xie Lin’s smooth talking. If he had a chance to go back in time, he would probably still only be able to squeeze out, “Leave or don’t, I don’t care.”
Xie Lin noticed the water dripping from Chi Qing’s hair tips. Remembering from the last time he borrowed the hair dryer, he found it in the storage cabinet, plugged it in, and gestured for Chi Qing to come over: “Quid pro quo. Last time I pretended to be sick so you’d blow-dry my hair, this time it’s my turn to blow-dry yours.”
Chi Qing suspected that Xie Lin had been plotting against him since the “pretending to be sick” incident.
Who knew that blowing dry your hair could lead to a sequel?
Considering the two things he said earlier sounded unfriendly, Chi Qing spoke a bit slower this time, replacing the “I’m not handless, I’ll do it myself” in his head with a simple “Thank you.”
Chi Qing sat on the sofa. Xie Lin tested the temperature of the air with his palm, then placed his fingertips into Chi Qing’s hair.
Chi Qing’s bangs were blown up by the air, covering his eyes. He felt the man’s movements behind him fall lightly; sometimes he could feel them, and the next second they would vanish. It was very light. The man’s long, slender fingers moved with the wind, slowly inserting themselves into the cool hair, carrying a kind of indescribable itch.
…
He had felt a sense of intimacy when he dried Xie Lin’s hair that day, but he hadn’t expected that reversing the roles would make it feel even more intimate.
Of course, their relationship was different now, too.
And so, this excessive intimacy felt logical in this moment, and even hinted at moving deeper.
Chi Qing had long bangs, which took some effort to dry, but it wasn’t true long hair, so it didn’t take long.
Xie Lin’s fingertips moved away from the now-dry hair. His thumb brushed over the side of Chi Qing’s face inadvertently, followed the contours of his face inch by inch, and finally stopped at the other’s lean chin. He used his index finger to lift Chi Qing’s chin, forcing him to look up.
This was a very clear signal for a kiss.
One person was sitting, the other standing behind him. Xie Lin only needed to lower his head to touch the person on the sofa. Both of their breathing was unstable.
Just as the distance grew shorter and shorter.
Chi Qing suddenly pushed him away.
Because Chi Qing sat up straight so suddenly, Xie Lin’s chin slammed firmly into the top of Chi Qing’s head: “Hiss.”
Chi Qing loosened his slightly stiff fingers and explained: “I… it was a reflex.”
It was true that he wasn’t ready, and it was true that it was a reflex.
For someone with mysophobia, the progress of his physical contact with Xie Lin—from holding hands to hugging, and even tolerating Xie Lin touching his clean hair after petting a cat without washing his hands—could already be described as lightning-fast.
But habits built up over many years are hard to change in an instant.
“It’s my fault,” Xie Lin ruffled Chi Qing’s dry hair and said, “I couldn’t help it.”
Late at night, Dr. Wu, who had just finished work, was preparing to go to sleep when his phone received a message.
Due to the nature of his profession, Dr. Wu’s phone remained on 24 hours a day, in case any patient felt suicidal in the middle of the night and needed psychological comfort. For many patients with psychological issues, the middle of the night is when they are particularly vulnerable.
He had just taken a call from a patient before bed: “Dr. Wu, I feel a sense of loneliness washing over me, like I’ve been abandoned by the whole world…”
After hanging up, a message from another patient came in.
-Dr. Wu, good evening. Are you asleep?
Seeing the name “Xie Lin,” Dr. Wu thought to himself that Xie Lin rarely chatted in the middle of the night. Don’t tell me he ran into something, he thought, replying professionally: Not yet. What’s up?
Xie Lin: I have a question to ask you. Does someone with mysophobia tend to resist certain things? Like kissing.
Dr. Wu: Are you reading those psychology textbooks again? It depends on the degree. Someone with typical mysophobia shouldn’t…
Xie Lin: Someone like Chi Qing.
Dr. Wu: “…”
He never expected to be woken up in the middle of the night to discuss whether someone with mysophobia could kiss.
-People like Mr. Chi aren’t in the typical category; he has a specific type of mysophobia that has persisted for a long time. He likely wouldn’t be able to accept it.
Xie Lin asked again: In a situation like his, are there any measures to take?
Dr. Wu didn’t ask any further questions and remained professional to the end: If that’s the case, you can try to take it step by step, gradually closing the distance to give the other person a process to adapt.
Xie Lin signaled that he understood.
-Thanks, Dr. Wu. It’s getting late; get some sleep.
After a long pause, Dr. Wu replied:
-…You’re welcome.
Since their previous date ended in a murder case, and with Xie Lin repeatedly emphasizing, “The last one doesn’t count; normal dates aren’t like that,” the previous date was voided and had to be rescheduled.
Both had to admit that they really did have a constitution that attracted murders wherever they went.
Before rescheduling, they discussed the location for the date.
Chi Qing stated calmly: “The first time you asked me out, it was at a bar. The next day, a girl named Yang Zhenzhen died there.”
“The second time you asked me out, we went to the movies. We had just left the mall when someone jumped to their death.”
“…”
These were all undeniable facts.
Xie Lin: “Places with few people aren’t safe, and places with many people are even worse. How about we just date at home?”
Chi Qing pointed downstairs.
The tenant downstairs was Ren Qin, who had almost met with a mishap shortly after Chi Qing moved in.
Chi Qing said: “It’s not like there’s no danger at home.”
Xie Lin: “…………”
Chi Qing changed the subject, realizing that if they kept talking, today’s date would just fall through: “But it’s still better than outside. The probability of an incident should be smaller.”
Being in love makes people lose their intelligence. Xie Lin unlocked his phone and came up with a stupid idea: “I’ll call Ren Qin and ask where she is and if she’s safe.”
Chi Qing nodded: “That works too.”
The call was answered quickly.
Ren Qin was working at a dessert shop and answered: “Hello? Brother Xie?”
Xie Lin could hear customers ordering in the background: “You’re at work right now?”
“Yeah,” Ren Qin said, “we don’t get weekends off. What’s up?”
Xie Lin: “Nothing. Stay safe.”
Ren Qin: “??”
Hearing the words “stay safe” from either Xie Lin or Chi Qing was enough to make anyone anxious.
Learning from her previous experience, Ren Qin asked cautiously: “Is there… a serial killer in our building again?”
“No…”
How was he supposed to say that he and Chi Qing just wanted to have a peaceful date?
Xie Lin: “The building is quite safe, don’t worry. I just wanted to say it rained last night, so be careful on your way home.”
“Oh, thanks. I will,” Ren Qin replied.
…
Xie Lin thought to himself that it was rare for a date to be this cautious.
Today, the weather had cleared, and it was warming up.
But none of that mattered to Chi Qing. The curtains in his house were drawn tight, not letting a single ray of light in.
The two picked a random movie to watch. Chi Qing’s habit of disliking the sun became an advantage in this moment. The room was pitch black, like a private cinema.
They had watched a movie together once before, but at that time, they could at least manage to spare some energy to pay attention to what the movie was about.
This time, they didn’t take anything in.
The TV played like a silent film. The shots drifted by quietly; they didn’t even see who the lead actor was.
Both of them had their own things on their minds. Xie Lin was thinking about how to proceed step-by-step, while Chi Qing was thinking about his subconscious reaction the night before.
That scene yesterday had been too embarrassing, to the point that it kept looping in his head before he went to sleep.
Why did he avoid it?
Under the circumstances, avoiding it was the only thing that made it weird.
Chi Qing got more annoyed the more he thought about it, feeling like he had botched the whole thing.
He kept asking himself: when Xie Lin got close to him, was he repulsed? The answer was clearly “No.”
Apart from the reflex, it was more about the loss of composure brought on by his erratic heartbeat, leaving him feeling overwhelmed and at a loss for how to handle it.
On the TV screen, the movie scene dimmed abruptly. All the light in the room vanished. Xie Lin was just about to reach for Chi Qing’s hand to take the first step of his gradual process, but he hadn’t expected someone else to play out of turn—Chi Qing leaned over toward his side, one hand propped up beside him, closing the distance between them the second the light faded.
Xie Lin met eyes with Chi Qing, whose eyes were deeper than the darkness.
Then, he felt Chi Qing clumsily touch his lips with his own.
His heartbeat stopped for a fleeting moment.
And then, it resumed at an uncontrollable speed.
The movie screen gradually brightened, and the colorful light cast faint silhouettes over their bodies. The scene in the movie just happened to turn to a garden at night, where moonlight poured down, and a few butterflies with shimmering wings landed in the distance.
“Last time, I agreed to try dating you,” Chi Qing said after doing that, having tested for his answer, “…from today on, you can remove the ‘try’.”
