A week later, at the Zhou family’s small courtyard on Buzhou Mountain.
“Mother—!!!”
Maha, like a steamroller wielding thousands of cannons, charged ahead, instantly knocking the unprepared Jia Louluo from the bedroom into the living room. Then, he half-knelt by the bed and grabbed the frantically flapping little bird chick.
“Mother—!!!!!!”
The little phoenix let out a terrified shriek, and the next second Maha stuffed it into his pocket and turned to run out. Just then, Zhou Hui came in from outside, bumped right into him, and immediately drew his sword to block him: “Where are you going? Stop right there!”
Peacock Wisdom King didn’t utter a single word of nonsense, spraying out a roaring golden-red fire dragon: “Who do you think you are, get out of my way—!”
Clang, clang, clang.
The wooden house trembled, the cliff vibrated. Black smoke rose into the sky, and birds and beasts scattered within a ten-mile radius.
Zhou Hui and his eldest son confronted each other with murderous intent. Suddenly, a sharp chirping sound came from the flames. The little phoenix, with tears in its eyes, desperately flapped its still-sparse little wings, stumbling through the battlefield towards Zhou Hui, and crashed into Zhou Hui’s chest pocket, where it remained still.
“What’s wrong? What’s wrong? Were you scared?” Zhou Hui immediately acted like a victorious general, tightly covering his pocket and running out. Maha was furious behind him, shouting, “Zhou Hui, don’t take advantage of me, are you trying to suffocate Mother?” while chasing him with twin swords, knocking the struggling Jia Louluo out of the house again.
“…” Jia Louluo slowly got up from the ground, looked at Maha, who was chasing and slashing his father in the smoke in the distance, and sighed again, sitting cross-legged on a rock.
“Hey, buddy, want a rabbit leg, buddy?” Second Young Master Zhang, wearing an apron, enthusiastically waved by the bonfire. In front of him were two wild rabbits sizzling with oil over the flames. His outdoor grilling technique was quite professional: after roasting over an open flame for a few rounds, he would brush on a layer of salt, then rotate it a few more times and brush on a layer of spices. This process was repeated several times, allowing the flavor to seep into the meat. When it was almost cooked, the meat was fragrant, making one quite hungry.
However, Jia Louluo’s eye twitched when he saw him like this. “No… no, thank you.”
“Oh, come on, what’s there to be shy about among family? I hear my brother used to dote on you the most. How about it? I’ll give you the fattest leg. Don’t say your uncle doesn’t care about you, second nephew!”
Jia Louluo: “…”
Jia Louluo took the grilled rabbit leg and involuntarily glanced up at the sky, fearing that the next second, a hundred thousand thunder tribulations would strike from the Formless Heaven, turning him into charcoal on the spot.
When the Phoenix hatched, the Nine Heavens and Ten Earths vibrated, and besides the bizarre celestial phenomena in the human world that sparked many speculations, the other five paths immediately received the news.
Zhou Hui, who was closest to the scene, immediately tucked the little phoenix into his embrace. Just as he was about to leave, he suddenly felt as if he had forgotten something. He looked back and saw Second Young Master Zhang with his butt sticking out, lying behind him, pressing his face tightly to the ground, and covering his ears with both hands.
Zhou Hui’s mood was indescribable. After a long while, he trembled and asked, “Buddha, what are you doing?”
“Did it hatch?”
“It hatched.”
“Did my brother come out?”
“He came out.”
Zhang Shun breathed a sigh of relief, carefully raised one eye, and after confirming there was no danger, he climbed up, covered in dirt, and plopped onto the ground: “Damn, why did it hatch so suddenly? I should have brought noise-canceling, gas-mask headphones! This is practically a soul attack! What if it creates another heart demon?! I’ll never make that mistake again!”
Zhou Hui: “…”
Zhou Hui, holding his freshly hatched, wet wife, and with a true-gold-Buddha-pendant Zhang Shun hanging from his leg, slowly and arduously made his way home. His original plan was to respectfully “sweep out”… respectfully send off the Righteous Buddha in a couple of days, to prevent Mount Sumeru from emptying its coffers to demand his return. However, the Phoenix Wisdom King, who had KO’d two Great Asura Kings, dealt with the heart demon Shakyamuni, and personally sent the Righteous Buddha back to the Formless Heaven with one strike, possessed too much deterrent power. Mount Sumeru truly didn’t dare to cause trouble; not a single person came to visit.
Zhang Shun saw this and immediately had hope for a new life, stubbornly refusing to leave the Zhou family. To show his sincerity, he voluntarily took on the heavy responsibility of cooking, washing dishes, and cleaning house, and immediately demonstrated his outdoor grilling skills, which he had honed in the past to impress girls.
Then, on the third day, Jia Louluo, who had sensed his mother’s birth in the human realm, rushed to Buzhou Mountain from thousands of miles away. Upon entering and seeing his mother, he immediately knelt down.
Zhou Hui had psychological trauma concerning his son. His first instinct was to pack Jia Louluo up and throw him out, but as the saying goes, blood is thicker than water, and the bond of kinship (…) buried deep in the soul cannot be severed. Second Young Master Zhang had already embraced Jia Louluo, saying, “Hello, hello, we’re like brothers,” and welcomed him in.
Since even his brother-in-law had entered, he couldn’t stop his own son from coming in. Zhou Hui had no choice but to sit in the corner with the little phoenix, managing to console himself with “at least that real troublemaker hasn’t arrived yet.”
—Who knew that this last bit of luck would soon be shattered.
A week after the little phoenix hatched, Maha finally arrived from the Sea of Blood. Upon entering, he tried to run away with his mother, almost causing another bloodbath between father and son.
As for why Maha arrived a week later, the reason was simple—the Phoenix’s hatching produced enormous energy, sweeping across the Sea of Blood like a hurricane, forcefully flattening the roaring waters. Maha, who was flying above the Sea of Blood at the time, was unable to dodge and was directly pressed into the water, instantly suffocating and passing out for an entire week.
When this group gathered on Buzhou Mountain, it was simply a battlefield for gods and demons in the Three Realms. The small wooden house was destroyed once every day. Every evening at six, the battle would start punctually. Maha would launch a sneak attack, Zhou Hui would resist, and then they would begin parricide & filicide; Jia Louluo would sit cross-legged and chant Buddhist scriptures, looking at the Buddha who was busy by the bonfire, deeply feeling that he would someday be struck by divine retribution and turned into a puddle of meat.
After a while, Zhou Hui finally felt that this couldn’t go on.
Not to mention that Jia Louluo had to tirelessly help rebuild the house every day, but also that the little phoenix was constantly in and out of fire and water, seeing nothing but heavy-duty violence, which was too bad for its growth and development.
Zhou Hui finally decided to knock Maha unconscious and sink him into the Sea of Blood, then move the entire family and take the little phoenix back to the human world.
The plane flew smoothly through the clouds. In the business class, a flight attendant politely pushed a meal cart and asked, “Sir, would you like chili beef with rice or baked tomato pasta?”
“No, thank you.”
Jia Louluo’s indifferent eyes peeked out from under his bandages, staring at the black, rubbery jerky in the cloth bag in front of him. He lowered his head and took a bite.
Flight attendant: “…”
What does this person do? Is he a terrorist? What is he eating? Is it plastic explosives…? The flight attendant walked away, her mind in a jumble.
“Hello, sir, would you like chili beef with rice or baked tomato pasta?”
“Why doesn’t your flight have first class? These seats are too small and uncomfortable, and why are the movies all from last year? That’s really uninspired. Uh, I’ll have the garlic baked lobster with a bottle of Hugel & Fils 2000 Riesling SGN… What, you don’t have it? 650g of crayfish is fine too. Still no? You must have orange French foie gras with toast, right? What, then what do you have?”
“Sir, we only have beef with rice or baked pasta.”
Second Young Master Zhang pulled down his Bvlgari sunglasses, revealing deep, movie-star-like eyes that constantly sparked with electricity. After a long while, he grudgingly said, “I haven’t eaten anything in a long time. How about this, give me three servings of each.”
Flight attendant: “…”
The meal trays piled up into a small mountain of food, and the airplane meals emitted an indescribably strong odor, intensely stimulating Zhang Shun’s stomach, which hadn’t eaten normal human food for several months.
Second Young Master Zhang nodded contentedly and casually slipped two hundred yuan in tips into the flight attendant’s hand.
“Sir… sir, chili beef with rice or baked tomato pasta?”
Zhou Hui turned to look at his satisfied brother-in-law and second son, then at the bewildered flight attendant, and politely said, “A glass of milk.”
“…Huh?”
“With sugar, warm, in a glass.”
The flight attendant couldn’t believe how easy this was. She pushed the meal cart away in disbelief, and a moment later returned with a glass of fresh milk for Zhou Hui.
Zhou Hui took a sip and was very satisfied: “Thank you.”
The flight attendant felt she had finally met a normal person, and in her joy, she couldn’t help but blush at Zhou Hui’s striking smile. Just as she was about to say “you’re welcome,” she saw Zhou Hui stand up with the milk, walk straight into the airplane lavatory, and close the door.
Flight attendant: “…”
The flight attendant slowly turned to stone in the wind. What was this person going to do on the plane?!
Inside the lavatory, Zhou Hui placed the milk cup on the counter. Immediately, a fluffy little head chirped its way out of his pocket, flapped its small wings twice, and stood shakily at the edge of the glass.
“Chirp—Chirp!”
The little phoenix began to peck at the milk. Zhou Hui carefully held the chick’s nape with two fingers, afraid it would get too engrossed and fall into the cup.
This kind of accident had happened once when feeding it at the airport. At that time, the little phoenix’s claws were tender, and its plump little body was unstable, so it flopped into the milk with a plop. Before Zhou Hui could scoop it out, the little phoenix immediately shrieked and flew out of the cup, milk spraying everywhere and instantly splattering Zhou Hui’s face with suspicious white liquid.
“Chirp chirp… Chirp chirp chirp…” On the plane, the little phoenix rubbed Zhou Hui’s finger with its tender beak, then lowered its head to continue pecking, and then let out a small burp.
Zhou Hui picked up the little phoenix and kissed its warm, soft, fine feathers.
The day before he left Mount Sumeru, Venerable Bhadra had visited late at night, admitting that he was the one who had redirected the passage between the divine and demonic realms half a month ago, enabling Zhou Hui to visit the Righteous Buddha in the Formless Heaven—Zhang Shun was very grateful for this and insisted on having Venerable Bhadra stay for breakfast, which the latter quickly declined.
Zhou Hui didn’t particularly mind Venerable Bhadra’s small calculation. He had already accumulated a bellyful of questions about raising the little phoenix, even the Heavenly Dao Zhihu couldn’t provide answers. So, he seized the opportunity to question Venerable Bhadra. In fact, Bhadra wasn’t very clear about the growth process of a phoenix chick—back then, the little phoenix was entirely raised by Shakyamuni in the Glacier Temple. The few great Venerables, let alone participating, found it difficult to even meet him; but the Venerable tried his best to recall the old events from tens of thousands of years ago and still provided a few valuable pieces of advice.
First, there was no need to specifically feed it. The phoenix was an ancient divine bird, a creature of heaven and earth. When it wanted to eat, it would find something to its liking, and if it truly didn’t eat, it wouldn’t matter for ten or twenty years.
Second, when the phoenix first hatched, its spiritual intelligence had not yet awakened, just like a newly born bird chick. Whether it was close to someone or not was purely instinctual. As for whether it could recover its memories from its previous life, that was something even heaven couldn’t predict.
Zhou Hui was slightly disheartened and asked, “Then when will he regain his consciousness?”
“When the phoenix takes human form, its spiritual intelligence will naturally awaken.” Venerable Bhadra smiled slightly and said, “As for how many years it will take to take human form, that’s truly uncertain… Among ancient divine beasts, there are white tigers that don’t take human form for tens of thousands of years, and there are qilin that take human form as soon as they land. It can only be said that when it takes human form depends on the phoenix’s own will. Donor Zhou, you might as well… let nature take its course.”
Zhou Hui held the little phoenix in his palm, raised it to his eyes, and looked into its round, bright black eyes.
“You won’t make me wait too long, will you?” Zhou Hui whispered.
The little phoenix tilted its head, completely unaware of what the handsome man in front of him was saying, its expression full of confusion.
However, a few seconds later, its eyes lit up, seemingly having thought of a solution to the problem. So it stretched its neck forward, flapped its small wings, and affectionately rubbed Zhou Hui’s mouth corner with its tender beak.
“Chirp chirp chirp!” The little phoenix said contentedly.
Zhou Hui stroked its small head with one finger. Although there was still sadness in his eyes, a smile appeared at the corner of his mouth.
The plane slowly landed in Beijing.
Half an hour later, Zhou Hui, wearing sunglasses, leather boots, and a black motorcycle leather jacket, with his wife in his pocket and his second son and brother-in-law behind him, stepped out of Beijing Capital Airport like a Hollywood superstar on a red carpet.
A special person had already parked his car at the parking lot entrance. Zhou Hui stood in front of the gleaming black Mulsanne, holding the key in one hand and pointing to the extremely domineering logo on the car’s hood with the other, solemnly saying: “Wife, this is our family car, bought two years ago, worth XXX million… From now on, it’s your milk money! Understand?!”
The little phoenix poked its head out of his chest pocket and looked up and down at the black behemoth: “…Chirp?”
“Tsk, tsk, tsk, who knows how much protection money he extorted from those monks on Mount Sumeru. Don’t think I don’t know, last time he stayed at the Glacier Temple for two months, and when he left, he dug out all the luminous pearls illuminating the walls. He actually stole a whole bagful…” Zhang Shun slammed the car door shut, planning to complain to Jia Louluo in solidarity, when he suddenly saw Jia Louluo’s calm expression, “—Hmm? Don’t you think this idiot is too much?”
“…It’s fine.”
“What do you mean ‘fine’?! That’s the Glacier Temple! He dug it out until it looked like an illegal building! Even the gold bricks embedded in the floor were dug out and transported away. Bhadra said no wonder he ran so fast when he left, he was in a hurry to deliver them, and no one could catch up! And you still think ‘it’s fine’?!”
“…” Jia Louluo turned his head in the back seat and finally admitted, “The act itself is wrong.”
Just as Zhang Shun was about to agree enthusiastically, he heard him continue, “However, I am his heir, so…”
Jia Louluo shrugged, making an expression that suggested it was only natural.
“…” Zhang Shun’s mouth twitched, and countless alpacas galloped through the Buddha’s mind.
Zhou Hui finally drove skillfully back to the National Security Special Office, parked the car below the familiar gray building, and looked through the car window at the unit’s main entrance.
Two guards stood sentry at the gate, armed. Above the concrete steps, an inconspicuous glass door was open, no different from any other office building entrance in Beijing.
“Wife, this is where we work and earn money.” Zhou Hui stroked the little phoenix’s head, his tone filled with deep emotion:
“Although you can’t actually earn much money here, after deducting social insurance and housing provident fund from the salary, it’s not even enough to buy you two bags of French-made high-grade egg and milk bird biscuits; but here we have our familiar friends and brothers, people we once fought alongside. More importantly, they won’t abandon you when facing danger, and they won’t betray you when facing temptation…”
The little phoenix listened quietly, seemingly understanding.
In the back seat, Zhang Shun and Jia Louluo both had expressions of profound emotion in their eyes.
“More importantly, it’s so smooth working with them to extort, do private jobs, and trick Shanxi coal bosses into coming to Beijing for peace charms!” Zhou Hui said happily, “Situ Yingzhi alone sold two dozen this year! He called me last time and said there’s eight million in outstanding payments waiting for me to settle! —So overall, this job is quite profitable. From now on, that’s your snack money, wife!”
The little phoenix didn’t understand, but seeing Zhou Hui happy made it happy too. With a whoosh, it flew onto Zhou Hui’s shoulder and chirped loudly in agreement: “Chirp! Chirp chirp chirp! Chirp chirp chirp!”
In the back seat, Zhang Shun and Jia Louluo’s jaws simultaneously dropped to the floor with a clang.
Zhou Hui kicked open the car door and got out swaggeringly, his posture as if he had just trampled Afghanistan, punched Iraq, flattened the Pentagon and Buckingham Palace, razed MI6 to the ground, and returned victorious like a People’s Volunteer Army hero. He walked into the unit’s main entrance under the wide-eyed gaze of the two duty guards.
“Comrades—!”
A mighty roar shook the ground, making the entire building sway a few times. Everyone rushed to the second-floor corridor to look down.
Zhou Hui stood in the center of the first-floor lobby, took off his sunglasses and tossed them aside, holding up the dazzling golden-red little phoenix with both hands. His handsome face was incredibly arrogant: “Comrades, hello everyone! I’ve brought Phoenix Four back!”
“Long time no see! Did you miss me—”
