“Look at this,” Yun Ci pointed at the small ornament in Yu Xun’s hand, “it really resembles you.”
In his memory, he rarely spoke so candidly to Yu Xun: “…That’s why I wanted to win it for you.”
“Resembles me?”
“Resembles your eyes.”
Yu Xun was momentarily stunned. The small fish in his palm glimmered under the streetlight.
Yun Ci followed his gaze, looking into his eyes, “Didn’t you say that when you like someone, everything seems to resemble them?”
“……”
On the long street, the streetlights flickered.
For a moment, Yu Xun felt like he was dreaming.
He had recklessly suggested chasing after him because he really had no other options.
Yun Ci’s constant avoidance had been within his expectations. This person had always treated him as an enemy. How could he simply say he liked him just because he said so?
He felt like a person looking at the stars.
And then, for a moment, the starlight paused for him.
Yun Ci became more sober as the wind blew, but the words he had just said were fueled by the alcohol; otherwise, he wouldn’t have “unreasonably” tugged at Yu Xun’s clothes.
But even after sobering up, he didn’t feel any regret.
He took advantage of the opening he had just created, continuing, “So, do you want to give it a try?”
Yu Xun’s voice tightened as if confirming, “Try what?”
Yun Ci heard his own voice, equally tense, “Try dating.”
Yu Xun stood still for a long time without any movement. Then, he suddenly leaned down, getting a little closer to him—his nose lightly brushed past Yun Ci’s neck.
When he straightened up again, he asked, “Did you drink?”
“……” Yun Ci replied, “A little.”
Yu Xun: “How much is a little?”
Yun Ci: “Half a cup.”
Then, Yu Xun said in a very low voice, “You’ve had too much to drink.”
Yun Ci pulled back from the conversation he had suddenly avoided. Before Yu Xun could step back, he reached out and grabbed his wrist, “Do you want to try?”
Yu Xun lowered his head to look at Yun Ci’s hand on his wrist, holding back for a moment before finally saying, “Go home and think about it overnight. We’ll talk when you’re sober tomorrow.”
Yun Ci tightened his grip and said, “I haven’t had too much to drink; no need to think about it.”
Yu Xun: “Hmm, you haven’t had too much to drink.”
He spoke each word carefully, like coaxing a child, “Then just give me some time, okay?”
Although Yu Xun said that, Yun Ci was well aware of who this time was really for.
It was for him.
He was giving him time and a chance to change his mind.
Even though his voice was somewhat hoarse, he still tried to lighten the pressure of the conversation with his usual casual tone, “……It’s strange, isn’t it?”
His voice lowered, “Clearly, I’m the one who wants to be together the most.”
“But I’m still afraid to take advantage of the fact that the person I like is drunk and agree.”
–
When Luo Sifang and the others returned to the dormitory, they found that Yun Ci and Yu Xun had come back first.
Peng Yiyuan said, “Liu Zi and the others are still looking for you two.”
As he spoke, he thought of the commotion at the night market just now, “They were playing like crazy, over ten rounds, making the shop owner smile from ear to ear. We had to drag them away—why did you two come back first?”
Yu Xun’s voice was a bit hoarse, “Nothing much to see, so we came back first.”
The other person didn’t speak.
Yun Ci sat at the table, his jacket open, looking very hot. He was holding a pen, writing something.
“Oh,” Peng Yiyuan rationalized Yun Ci’s behavior, “Is Ci-ge rushing back to study?”
He was working on a difficult calculus problem.
The problem was hard and not easy to solve; he had already filled almost half a page.
Peng Yiyuan glanced at it and quickly stepped away from the table, as if the half-page of calculations had burned him, “Too scary; I’m going to sleep.”
Before leaving, he smelled something, “Who drank alcohol?”
“……”
Yun Ci paused in his writing.
Was that half cup of “drink” really that noticeable?
Why did it seem like everyone thought he drank a lot?
After Peng Yiyuan got into bed, he noticed that the atmosphere between the two who had returned earlier seemed a bit odd.
Because Yu-ge had gone into the bathroom first, and right after, Yun Ci, who never shared with anyone, also went in—he even brought that piece of calculus problem paper with him, which was very unusual.
In the bathroom.
As soon as Yu Xun entered and was about to close the door, a hand blocked the doorframe from outside, and Yun Ci squeezed in from the outside.
With a “bang,” the door closed behind Yun Ci, and he and Yu Xun were now in a completely enclosed space.
Yu Xun lowered his eyes. Since the space was small, the two of them were very close. By slightly lowering his head, his gaze could pass through Yun Ci’s collar, glimpsing the thin collarbone below.
Yun Ci had a faint smell of alcohol on him, but his pupils were exceptionally clear.
He almost forcibly handed him the paper, “Look at the problem.”
Yu Xun took it, initially thinking that he couldn’t solve it and had brought it to ask him. But after a glance, he found that the problem-solving process was clear and the final answer was correct.
Yun Ci leaned against the door, and the faucet had just been turned on by Yu Xun. The sound of running water masked the conversation between the two in the bathroom.
Yun Ci wasn’t very good at speaking the truth, especially in front of Yu Xun. He was used to saying the opposite of what he meant.
But at this moment, he forced himself to speak the words, shouting in his heart, “If I weren’t sober now, I wouldn’t be able to solve this problem.”
“Tomorrow is fine too,” Yun Ci said, taking another step back, “Anyway, my answer tomorrow will be the same as tonight’s.”
After a moment, Yun Ci pushed the door open and left the bathroom.
It was only after he left that his face started to feel very hot.
The dorm lights went out at the designated time.
Yun Ci lay in bed, unable to sleep for a long time. He thought, Yu Xun’s reaction was very normal.
He had just started to respond not long ago.
After all these years of fighting and hostility, he had always regarded him as the most hated person.
The situation just now was indeed a bit unexpected; no one anticipated it would develop like this.
……
The most important thing was that he hadn’t prepared anything in the rush earlier.
Yu Xun gave him the chance to think it over, and he really needed to consider how to make a more formal confession.
Yun Ci thought about it and planned to search online for something like “confession strategies,” but he couldn’t resist checking WeChat and looking at Yu Xun’s profile picture.
Yu Xun hadn’t sent him any messages.
He hadn’t sent any either.
Both of them tacitly agreed to wait for tomorrow.
However, Li Yan sent him a bunch of unread messages: [Me and Liu Zi ended up 8:8. If we had played one more round, I definitely would have won.]
Li Yan: [We ended up taking a bunch of red flags back.]
Li Yan: [Are you asleep? I can’t sleep.]
Li Yan: [8:8]
Yun Ci wasn’t asleep, but he didn’t feel like responding either.
The next day.
Yun Ci only fell asleep in the second half of the night. When he woke up, it was almost ten o’clock, and by the time he got out of bed, the lower bunk was already empty.
He asked, and Peng Yiyuan said, “Yu-ge? He went out early in the morning with Liu Zi, probably to the shop.”
Yun Ci glanced at his phone.
There was still no unread messages.
Yun Ci ruffled his hair, climbed down from the upper bunk, washed up, ate something casually, and then sat at the table planning his confession for a long time before suddenly asking Peng Yiyuan, “Do you still have the love letter you wrote last time?”
“Love letter?”
Yun Ci replied with a “hmm”: “I want to study it.”
Peng Yiyuan thought that Yun Ci and Yu Xun had been acting strangely lately: “Why do you want to study that?”
Yun Ci said casually, “I’ve never written one, I want to see.”
Having followed Li Yan and Liu Zi last night, Peng Yiyuan had picked up on their way of thinking and said, “I get it. Last time, you let Yu-ge go first, but now that you’ve given him many days, it’s time for you to surpass him.”
“……”
If that’s how you want to understand it, fine.
As he said this, Peng Yiyuan was about to start passionately imparting his love letter writing experience: “I’ve written over a dozen; in this field, I’m much better than my professional courses. I think I’m quite an authority. First—”
Yun Ci suddenly interrupted, “Forget it.”
Peng Yiyuan: “Why forget it? You don’t want to listen anymore?”
“Your love letters are ineffective,” Yun Ci said, “They’re poorly written.”
“I never learn from bad students.”
“…………”
Peng Yiyuan was struck: “It’s already a sad topic, and you’re attacking me.”
He decided to write it himself.
Yun Ci might not have experience writing love letters, but he had received a love letter from Yu Xun.
So he found a piece of paper.
He initially thought this task would be quick to complete.
But many things are only difficult when you actually do them yourself. Perhaps because of the gravity of the matter, every word and sentence he wrote on the paper had to be carefully considered.
He could write an essay in one class, but now he couldn’t write a few sentences all morning.
It seemed that no matter what words he used, they couldn’t truly express what he wanted to say.
“So when he wrote love letters,” Yun Ci said to the sparse lines on the paper, “……did he feel the same way?”
One love letter seemed too plain.
Yun Ci initially thought of buying a bouquet of flowers, but when choosing flowers, his eyes fell on the display pictures posted by the shop, red roses.
He thought of the one Yu Xun had folded for him.
After a while, Yun Ci closed the shopping app.
He opened his social media and found the post Yu Xun had shared, then clicked on it.
A mechanical voice accompanied the video: “A paper rose tutorial that’s gone viral online. Once you learn it, you won’t have to worry about what to give your significant other. First, take a piece of paper like this, then fold it in this direction, the next step…”
Yun Ci found a piece of paper and followed along, pausing as he went.
He had never folded this kind of thing before, so he had to rewind to see where he went wrong.
Writing a love letter was difficult.
Folding a paper rose was also hard.
In the process of preparing his confession, Yun Ci inadvertently did what Yu Xun had once done for him.
Nothing Yu Xun did for him was easy.
If it wasn’t for love, who would have the patience to repeatedly watch tutorials?
In the evening.
Like last time, Yun Ci left the dormitory early, before eight o’clock, and waited at the stairwell.
He half-squatted on the steps, holding something, silently reciting the lines he had prepared. As he muttered them, like memorizing a book, he occasionally checked the time on his phone.
The closer it got to eight, the more chaotic his mind became.
The more he repeated the lines, the less he remembered, and as eight o’clock approached, he gradually forgot what he was going to say.
At exactly eight o’clock.
When Yun Ci heard footsteps coming from below and looked up to see the person standing in front of him, all the prepared lines were completely forgotten, and his mind went blank.
Yu Xun: “Why are you squatting here?”
Yun Ci, with a blank mind, said, “Waiting for you.”
Yu Xun’s gaze swept down, noticing the boy’s cold jawline and soft hair: “You don’t need to wait here; you can just message me directly.”
Although Yun Ci wasn’t looking at him, he could still sense where his gaze landed.
He raised his hand to smooth his hair, worried that it hadn’t been properly groomed before he came out. When he put his hand down, he said unnaturally, “How can I notify you in advance if it’s a confession?”
His sudden use of the word ‘confession’ made Yu Xun think he had heard wrong: “What?”
“Confession.” Yun Ci repeated.
“You said to think about it for a day last night,” Yun Ci continued, “I’ve thought it through.”
“……”
Yun Ci handed him the prepared items. Yu Xun bent down slightly to take them and was surprised to find a letter and a paper rose in his hand. White.
Dormitory building, at the corner of the stairwell.
The sound-activated light above flickered on and off.
He opened the envelope, and inside was neatly written handwriting. Yun Ci’s handwriting had actually been a bit messy since high school, not so neat and tidy; only in elementary school had he written so meticulously.
And it was clear that writing it was quite laborious.
[I like you.
Maybe even earlier than when I realized it myself. On my birthday, I thought my fast heartbeat was because of running. Or maybe even earlier, I thought my attention to you was because of hostility. I wanted to wait until you noticed and then respond, but it seems hard to control. Situations always develop uncontrollably, just like a racing heartbeat.
If I could, there’s one thing I’d like to take back.
I’m also very interested in someone like you.]
Yu Xun held the letter with one hand, reading slowly, as if he wanted to engrave each word in his heart.
He had waited a whole day, during which he had stared at their chat window countless times, wanting to send something but never doing so.
In the end, he didn’t wait for Yun Ci to “regret,” and he didn’t wait for him to admit that he was impulsive and irrational under the influence of alcohol last night. Instead, he received an even more formal confession.
Yun Ci maintained his original posture and broke the silence: “Do you still think it was because of the alcohol?”
Yu Xun’s fingers holding the letter stiffened, his knuckles whitening from the force, and his pupils darkened as he said word by word, “I gave you a chance, Xiao Ci.”
“If you—” His whole demeanor was imposing, and his words carried a strong sense of pressure, “If you don’t regret it, you won’t have another chance in the future.”
There was only one chance, like last night’s.
Yun Ci didn’t avoid his gaze: “Who wants to regret it?”
Saying this, he reached out and said, “Give me your phone.”
“Change the note,” he explained, “Take off those two words.”
Holding Yu Xun’s phone, Yun Ci easily found his own white avatar at the top of the pinned list.
Previously, Yu Xun’s note for him was “future boyfriend.”
After removing the word “future,” the note became “boyfriend.”
The legitimate kind.
The boyfriend who’s dating him.
After Yun Ci finished editing and confirmed, Yu Xun also reached out: “Your phone.”
Yun Ci handed him his phone, as if performing some kind of relationship ceremony, they exchanged phones to change the notes for each other.
Before handing it over, Yun Ci had also pinned the black avatar in his friend settings.
Yu Xun typed quickly with one hand, and when he handed it back, the note had become a long string: “The most handsome boyfriend in the world.”
“…………”
“The word ‘most’ means,” in the first minute of confirming their relationship, Yun Ci’s competitive spirit surfaced, and he reflexively said, “You’re first.”
Yu Xun, dragging out his lazy tone like in high school, deliberately provoked him: “Yes, that’s what it means. You’re second.”
“……”
“Is there still a chance to regret?”
“No more,” Yu Xun’s eyebrows raised slightly, and the dormitory hallway light flickered again. The light in his eyes also gradually brightened, “You can’t go back for a lifetime.”
Omggggg jskdjdnd these two fools are going to make me cryyy