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Chapter 55: Hello aunt, hello uncle.
Gao Shu and Tang Cuo were dining at a Western restaurant, where a guitarist with a guitar slung over his shoulder roamed the premises, approaching tables and strumming a song when he caught someone’s eye.
Tang Cuo: “Really? They have singers here too?”
He glanced at the person again: “Foreigner? So old and still singing?”
Gao Shu: “He’s the owner of this place.”
Tang Cuo: “Oh.”
The owner seemed to be familiar with Gao Shu, and the two chatted animatedly. The elderly man with gray hair then turned to Tang Cuo with a kind smile and began singing a song Tang Cuo couldn’t understand.
Seeing the old man smile at him, albeit inexplicably, Tang Cuo smiled along. The song was lively, and while he had some impression of the music, both the song and the conversation between the owner and Gao Shu were in a language Tang Cuo couldn’t comprehend.
Noticing his confusion, Gao Shu leaned over and said to him, “It’s a French song.”
Tang Cuo: “What’s the name?”
Gao Shu looked into his eyes and said softly, “Love is Melancholy.”
Applause filled the restaurant as the audience applauded the owner’s performance. The atmosphere was vastly different from the places Tang Cuo had visited before; despite being a Western restaurant, it was unusually lively and cheerful. Because it was too lively, he didn’t immediately understand Gao Shu’s gaze, instead joining in with the others in applauding bewilderedly.
The owner walked up to him, hugged him, kissed his cheek twice, and said something with a smile.
Once the owner left, Tang Cuo immediately leaned over to Gao Shu again: “What did he say?”
Gao Shu: “You don’t have to pay today.”
Tang Cuo was surprised and delighted: “That’s so nice?!”
Gao Shu: “Because I’m footing the bill.”
Tang Cuo: “…What did he say exactly?”
Gao Shu shrugged. “Couldn’t quite hear, forgot.”
After finishing their dessert, Gao Shu directed Tang Cuo’s attention to the ceiling of the restaurant. It was then that Tang Cuo noticed the ceiling was designed like the skeleton of a whale, with the entire elongated space resembling the inside of a whale’s belly. Between the bones were numerous intricate and detailed murals, which Tang Cuo, slightly nearsighted, couldn’t see very clearly but could make out as crowded city streets.
They walked, dined, played music, and lived within the belly of the whale.
“…Big fish,” Tang Cuo muttered, mesmerized.
Gao Shu watched him quietly, only reminding him after a while, “Let’s go.”
After leaving the restaurant, just a few steps away, Tang Cuo felt uncomfortable. “I’m too full…”
Gao Shu: “That won’t do. You won’t get results with your fitness like this if you eat too much.”
Tang Cuo: “Aren’t you my coach? Why didn’t you remind me?”
Gao Shu shrugged, then immediately changed his tune. “Eat a little more; it’s okay. You’re very slim.”
“…I know,” Tang Cuo sat on the flower bed by the roadside, leaning against the roadside tree, “My ex-boyfriend used to say that.”
Gao Shu’s heart skipped a beat. He had never heard Tang Cuo mention his ex-boyfriend before because, when they first met, Tang Cuo had a nosebleed, and Gao Shu had always assumed he was an inexperienced otaku.
“When did you break up?” Sitting beside Tang Cuo, he asked as calmly as possible without showing any hint of anxiety.
Tang Cuo: “Early this year. He said I was too thin and didn’t want to date someone that skinny. I didn’t mind his weight. He insisted it was the camera adding pounds, and he was well-proportioned in real life. Bah.”
Gao Shu: “…The camera?”
Tang Cuo: “Online dating, video chats, exchanged photos.”
Gao Shu: “Online dating isn’t reliable.”
Tang Cuo: “It depends on the person. There are reliable ones, but I just can’t seem to find one.”
Chatting eased his bloated stomach somewhat. Perhaps it was the quiet atmosphere of the street or the familiarity with Gao Shu, but Tang Cuo felt relaxed enough to share his thoughts.
“I’ve tried online dating 16 times, and none of them worked out,” he said. “Maybe it’s me.”
Gao Shu was completely stunned, pausing for a moment before asking, “Why so many times?”
“Online dating is simple,” Tang Cuo said, “and now I feel like I’m only used to online relationships. I don’t know how to date people in the real world anymore.”
When playing games, he’d shout in the chat or world channel, “Looking for a partner, male,” and soon someone would add him as a friend. At first, it was just to complete in-game tasks, but as they did more missions and chatted more, they seemed to develop a vague affection. Not seeing that person online every day would leave a void in his heart.
Or in a chat group for gay men, he’d say, “I really want a boyfriend,” and immediately, a bunch of people would bombard his contacts list with friend requests, with rows of red dots indicating new friend requests:
“Hello, let’s get to know each other.”
“You don’t mind if I’m married, right?”
“I’m a 1, but I can also be a 0.”
“Can you send a photo to see?”
Tang Cuo felt he was too fair and slender, and he worked in a crisis management office, always afraid that sending his photo to strangers would cause unnecessary trouble. Faced with requests for photos, he often said no after only a few chats. And once he refused to send a photo, the other person would immediately block him. A very few would curse him before blocking: “Don’t you know the rules?”
Now he’s even left these groups, feeling uninterested. All the conversations ended with either him blocking others or others deleting him.
“And I don’t consider interracial dating,” Tang Cuo said seriously. “The procedures for interracial dating are too complicated. When I first joined the crisis management office and was rotating in the service hall, there was a werewolf and a guide getting married. We had to fill out 28 forms in total, and the whole process took six months.”
Gao Shu: “Did they break up by the time the procedures were done?”
Tang Cuo: “No, got pregnant before marriage. You… stop thinking about these negative things, life is beautiful!”
He waved his arms and laughed, “Look at this tree, these lights, and the dinner we had tonight, right?”
Gao Shu looked at Tang Cuo, finding him more and more interesting and adorable, and couldn’t help but pat his head, “Let’s take a walk and digest our food.”
As they walked and talked, Tang Cuo kept talking about Tang Xing, “After hearing so much from me, do you also think my sister’s boyfriend is unreliable?”
“It’s okay, isn’t it?” Gao Shu said, “Pole dancing is a normal sport; besides the performance pole dancing, there is also competitive pole dancing. Your sister’s boyfriend has won awards; he is likely to come from a competitive background. It’s quite impressive; it’s not easy for a man who does pole dancing to persist, and if you say he dances beautifully, it’s even more remarkable.”
Tang Cuo didn’t tell Gao Shu about Meng Yu being a cross-dressing master; he considered it Meng Yu’s secret. But hearing Gao Shu praise Meng Yu, whom he had never met, Tang Cuo’s tone hardened: “Regardless of how difficult it is for him, if he wants to continue with my sister, he must pass my test. My sister and I rely on each other; if he wants to become a part of my family, he must have my approval. My sister and I share the same idea, whoever wants to be with me must also get her approval.”
Gao Shu: “Then when will you introduce me to your sister?”
Tang Cuo asked curiously, “Why do you want to meet her? Are you going to promote personal training courses to her? She’s not interested; she’s been practicing yoga at home for many years.”
The two of them walked to a bridge. The bridge was very short, only a few dozen meters long, and below the bridge was a narrow river with willow trees planted on both sides. It was late at night, and the long branches of the willow trees were swaying in the wind.
Leaning on the railing and looking up, the sky above was obscured by the city’s lights, and stars and the moon were not visible.
After looking for a while, Tang Cuo’s phone suddenly rang.
He took it out and found that it was a message from Gao Shu.
“…What’s up?” Tang Cuo asked Gao Shu with a smile, “Did you send it to the wrong person? I’m right here.”
Gao Shu looked at the dark river below: “I didn’t send it to the wrong person.”
Tang Cuo opened it and found that the message only had three words.
【Online dating?】
Tang Cuo: “…What do you mean?”
Gao Shu looked down and tapped the screen again, and soon Tang Cuo received a new message.
【Online dating, with me.】
Tang Cuo clutched his phone tightly, staring at the screen, barely recognizing those four words before turning to grab Gao Shu: “What is this?”
“You’re only used to online dating, aren’t you?” Gao Shu said. “Let’s do online dating then.”
“You’re crazy,” Tang Cuo said.
But his nosebleed was already flowing down in a winding path.
The sourness and pain deep in his nasal cavity made Tang Cuo want to cry. “You’re crazy, coach,” he quietly reminded Gao Shu, “Retract it quickly, while you still can.”
Gao Shu took out a tissue to wipe his nosebleed. Bleeding nose Tang Cuo, nervous Tang Cuo, red-eyed Tang Cuo— if it weren’t for the new suppressant delivered by the food delivery service before they left and Gao Shu taking two in time, he reckoned he’d be bleeding alongside Tang Cuo now.
“You’ve seen it; no retracting,” Gao Shu said. “You like my little fish; can’t you also like me as a consequence?”
Tang Cuo’s chest heaved, and he shouted, “I-I like it! But you’re my coach! If a student likes the coach, terrible things will happen.”
“I won’t take advantage of your liking me to deceive you into buying lessons.”
“Not lessons… if I like you, what am I going to do during our classes in the future? I’ll keep bleeding.”
Gao Shu decided to confirm seriously: “Are you sure you like me?”
Tang Cuo hesitated.
His fondness for Gao Shu had mostly shifted to the fish after encountering him, the swordfish. But at the moment of Gao Shu’s confession, Tang Cuo instantly remembered their first meeting. He was gentle, professional, had a good physique, and both his voice and appearance were like the tea he deeply loved. Tang Cuo grabbed the tissue and wiped his nose vigorously. “I like you,” he whispered, “Wait a moment; let’s not talk about this topic now. I’m feeling dizzy from blood loss.”
Nobody brought any suppressants. Gao Shu cradled his face, saying, “There’s another way to eliminate primary s*xual reactions.”
Tang Cuo stared blankly at him. He knew what Gao Shu meant by that method.
【S*xual reactions are divided into three levels: primary, intermediate, and advanced… In theory, higher-level s*xual reactions can override lower-level s*exual reactions. This means that when facing specific objects, if a sentinel or guide triggers an intermediate s*xual reaction, the original primary sexual reaction will be completely overridden and will not appear again. Similarly, when advanced s*xual reactions occur, intermediate and lower-level ones will disappear.】
The must-know and must-read passage from the textbook vividly entered Tang Cuo’s mind.
Gao Shu kissed him.
Almost at the moment their lips touched, the spiritual forces belonging to them suddenly surged. They carried joy and excitement, leaping out of the hosts and dissolving into the night sky. Tang Cuo’s limbs weakened; he knew this was the characteristic of an intermediate s*xual reaction and hurriedly grabbed Gao Shu’s arm.
His nasal cavity no longer hurts.
“No,” Gao Shu said, “You’re still bleeding.”
With a sly smile, he kissed Tang Cuo again, this time sincerely and seriously.
Tang Cuo’s last thought before closing his eyes was that Gao Shu was lying.
And the last scene he saw was the massive swordfish shark swimming over the bridge, passing through him and Gao Shu, and diving into the willow trees, the river, and the deep night.
“We have a colleague in our department; his friend’s spiritual form is the swordfish shark,” Xie Zijing said while watching a documentary about marine animals on the computer.
A long-haired rabbit was sleeping in his palm, not interested in the documentary, except for anything related to zombies.
Another hand of Xie Zijing had a sugar glider lying on it, its small eyes staring at the computer screen, unusually calm and composed.
Xie Zijing was explaining to it, “The Swordfish Shark has a big nose, and its teeth are very irregular, very ugly.”
The sugar glider looked up at him.
Xie Zijing: “Jiang Xiaochuan, is your rat lacking in intelligence? It doesn’t understand what I’m saying.”
“It’s a sugar glider!” Jiang Xiaochuan and Qin Ge sat at the dining table, staring at the phone in front of them, their faces tense. “Don’t disturb; I’m waiting…”
His phone rang, and he received a new text message.
Jiang Xiaochuan covered his eyes all of a sudden, turning his body sideways, not daring to look. Qin Ge lit up the screen: “Did I read it correctly?”
“I’ve been reading and reading. It’s just an entrance exam score? You’ve been checking all day and couldn’t find it; isn’t it troublesome?” Xie Zijing said.
Jiang Xiaochuan raised his head and shouted, “It’s none of your business!”
Qin Ge: “All A+, plus your specialty points in the robot competition, you should be able to get into the schools you want.”
Jiang Xiaochuan was stunned, “All A+?! Did the system make a mistake?”
He took the phone, found that Qin Ge was right, and after a moment of astonishment, he jumped up from his chair, shouting for joy.
Xie Zijing covered the rabbit’s ears and said, “Stop shouting; it’s disturbing.”
The sugar glider had already returned to its owner’s side, held by Jiang Xiaochuan, dancing. Qin Ge reminded him to share the good news with his parents, and Jiang Xiaochuan quickly picked up his phone, completely forgetting about the previous argument and running away from home, happily running to the balcony to make the call.
Qin Ge also breathed a sigh of relief. If Jiang Xiaochuan didn’t do well, Qin Shuangshuang and Jiang Leyang would not forgive him for running away from home and hanging out in bars. According to Jiang Xiaochuan, he had been taken to the Atlantis bar by a friend before the entrance exam and saw Meng Yu’s performance. He also discussed with Qin Ge that if he did well in the exam, Qin Ge had to allow him to go to the Atlantis bar to see Meng Yu again, and whether Qin Ge accompanied him or not was Qin Ge’s choice.
“Can he finally leave now?” Xie Zijing asked, “Shall we continue our two-person world?”
Qin Ge sat down beside him, snatching the rabbit from his hand. The rabbit woke up, its little paws hooked onto Xie Zijing’s fingers, and didn’t let go. Qin Ge pinched its waist to lift it up, revealing its long legs.
“I still have to do another ‘sea area’ patrol for Cai Yi tomorrow,” Qin Ge said, “I hope you don’t mind.”
Xie Zijing was stunned at his words. He thought Qin Ge hadn’t noticed, but in fact, Qin Ge knew.
This made Xie Zijing feel embarrassed. He scratched his head and said, “I don’t mind.”
Qin Ge: “Really?”
Xie Zijing: “What did that blond tell you?”
Qin Ge: “You have issues in your heart; you didn’t talk to me about it, but go find a vampire instead?”
Xie Zijing pulled his arm and smiled: “No, just venting a bit. That blond doesn’t really feed on people much anymore, so don’t worry.”
Qin Ge wasn’t interested in whether Francisco was still extracting blood from living beings. He turned around as Xie Zijing held his hand and kissed him on the cheek: “Cai Yi is from the Special Management Committee. This time, our work is mainly aimed at the leaders of the Special Management Committee. If I can solve his problem first, the rest of the work will be much smoother. And getting Cai Yi’s help would be beneficial to us.”
Xie Zijing suddenly understood: “…You hope that after Cai Yi investigates the Luquan incident, he will help us?”
“The possibility is very low; he’s a very secretive person,” Qin Ge said softly, “but we still have to try. When patrolling, I will chat with him little by little and tell him about myself. He’s very interested in me now; this is an opportunity… I hope you don’t think I’m despicable. I don’t know many people in the Special Management Committee, and Cai Yi is the highest-ranking official there. He has a much higher chance of accessing the Luquan incident files than others.”
Xie Zijing listened quietly. What Qin Ge did had deeper implications, but he didn’t realize it. This made Xie Zijing feel melancholic.
He couldn’t immediately understand Qin Ge’s intentions, nor could he help Qin Ge with the patrol in the sea area. His melancholy gradually turned into embarrassment; he sighed softly and remained silent.
“What’s wrong?”
“Will I be a burden to you?” Xie Zijing asked.
“No,” Qin Ge said decisively, “I’ve already obtained the application form for a diving partner today. I’ll give it to you later; fill it out carefully.”
Even this couldn’t make Xie Zijing feel happy.
“Since coming back here, I feel useless,” Xie Zijing said softly. “I can’t do anything. Coming to the Crisis Management Office was only because I needed your help. What can I do for the Adjustment Department? I can’t do anything.”
“That’s because the Adjustment Department isn’t suitable for you,” Qin Ge said decisively.
Xie Zijing: “…What department am I suitable for?”
After hesitating for a moment, Qin Ge told him: “The head of the Criminal Investigation Department met you during a team-building event and asked me about you.”
Xie Zijing: “?! “
Qin Ge: “Do you want to work with your idol?”
Xie Zijing fell silent.
“Talking about this might be to early, but you can consider it.” Qin Ge held his hand, interlocking their fingers, “I found a way to repair your ‘Sea Area’ that was destroyed.”
Xie Zijing leaned in to kiss him, feeling a mixture of unspoken sorrow and gratitude, intertwined with his growing dependence on Qin Ge.
“What’s the method?” he asked softly, “Does it pose any risk to you?”
“There’s a person who knows how to repair the sea area,” Qin Ge said.
As soon as he finished speaking, Jiang Xiaochuan jumped in from the balcony into the room. From his perspective, it looked like Xie Zijing was doing something inappropriate to Qin Ge. He quickly covered his eyes: “You guys continue; I’ll step aside.”
Xie Zijing thought that if he had known he needed to step aside, he wouldn’t have minded. He sat up straight and said casually, “What, are you going home tomorrow?”
“Yeah, going home,” Jiang Xiaochuan said, peering through his fingers at the two on the sofa. Seeing them in proper attire and nothing amiss, he put his hand down, “Ge, Mom and Dad want you to come home with me for dinner tomorrow.”
Qin Ge nodded, releasing his hand, and the rabbit jumped back into Xie Zijing’s arms. Xie Zijing said, “Perfect, I’m going to invite Blond to have hot pot, and this time he’s treating me.”
Qin Ge looked at him and said, “No, you’re going home with me.”
Both Jiang Xiaochuan and Xie Zijing were stunned.
“Just having a simple family meal; no need to be nervous,” Qin Ge said, getting up, but he hit his waist on the table after a few steps.
Jiang Xiaochuan: “Ge, you don’t need to be nervous either.”
Qin Ge took Jiang Xiaochuan and Xie Zijing home, where they were greeted by Qin Shuangshuang and Jiang Leyang waiting downstairs. Jiang Xiaochuan ran over shouting “Mom,” but Qin Shuangshuang just said “stand properly” to him and then turned to smile at Xie Zijing, “Hello, Xiao Xie.”
Xie Zijing extended his left hand to shake hands with her, halfway through realizing it was wrong, but it was too late to change.
“The most famous sentinel in the Western Office in recent years,” Jiang Leyang smiled. “You’re very outstanding; both Shuangshuang and I often hear people mention you.”
Xie Zijing: “Hello, Auntie, Uncle. I’m serious about Qin Ge; please rest assured.”
Qin Ge: “…”
He turned red. He pushed Xie Zijing and Qin Shuangshuang, “Alright, let’s go in.”
Xie Zijing usually encountered Gao Tianyue in the office with a blank face. Bai Xiaoyuan said he was utterly selfless and unwilling to say a word more to Gao Tianyue. But last night, Xie Zijing couldn’t sleep all night after returning home, downloaded a bunch of articles like “Complete Guide to Interpersonal Communication” and “Top Ten Ways to Praise Others” online, studied them seriously, and finally applied them today, becoming the most talkative person in the apartment.
“Uncle Jiang, you’re so good at cooking.” Qin Ge heard him talking to Jiang Leyang in the kitchen, “Auntie is so lucky. I have to learn from you and cook for Qin Ge in the future.”
Qin Ge: “…”
As he walked from the kitchen to the balcony, Xie Zijing began praising Qin Shuangshuang’s neglected succulents that were barely surviving: “These succulents are so cute; what if they grow long? Isn’t that free-spirited? It really suits your temperament, Auntie.”
Qin Ge: “…”
Jiang Xiaochuan ate an ice cream stick while looking at Xie Zijing, “What about me? Do you have any nice nonsense to tell me?”
Xie Zijing: “Jiang Xiaochuan’s spiritual body is very clever; it understands everything I say, truly like master, like servant.”
Qin Ge: “Alright… Why don’t you sit down and rest for a bit…”
The Sentinel smiled and sat down, looking around at the decorations in the house for a while before asking, “Which room do you live in?”
“It’s a study now,” Qin Ge told him. Qin Shuangshuang’s family didn’t have much space, and besides the bedrooms of Jiang Xiaochuan and the couple, there used to be a study. After Qin Ge was adopted by Qin Shuangshuang, the study became Qin Ge’s room, making Qin Shuangshuang and Jiang Leyang’s bedroom very crowded, and the couple often worked overtime in the living room. Now that Qin Ge had moved out, his room had returned to being a study. Qin Shuangshuang and Jiang Leyang wanted to keep Qin Ge’s things and not touch that room, but Qin Ge persuaded them not to waste the space in the house.
Xie Zijing looked at Qin Ge, his expression gentle, as if understanding the meaning behind all his actions: “I want to go see.”
Jiang Xiaochuan: “Ge used to sleep with me often; do you want to see my room?”
Xie Zijing: “Sure. But why did you sleep with him?”
Jiang Xiaochuan: “He was afraid of the dark.”
Xie Zijing smiled, “He’s not afraid now.”
As Xie Zijing and Jiang Xiaochuan walked away, Qin Shuangshuang sat next to Qin Ge, raised her eyebrows, and smiled at him. Qin Ge felt a little embarrassed and preemptively diverted the topic before Qin Shuangshuang could speak: “Aunt Qin, do you know when Teacher Zhang Xiao will be back?”
Qin Shuangshuang was surprised, “I heard it’s soon, but I’ll have to ask for the specific time. Why?”
“I want to ask him about something,” Qin Ge said, “about Lu Qinglai and also about repairing the ‘Sea Area’.”
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