The moment he saw Shan Yu’s tears, Chen Jian began to suspect that Yue Lang’s comment might not have been a joke.
He had thought Shan Yu would be happy. After all, scrolling through his old Moments, it was clear he had put a lot of thought into it. He had posted a lot about that gecko; its name was Da Ge (Big Brother), it had a gentle personality, was timid, and a picky eater…
But he really hadn’t expected Shan Yu to cry.
And not the kind of crying where your eyes just get red, but the kind where tears stream down your chin and drip onto his hand.
“Shan Yu…” Chen Jian stood there, at a complete loss. The moment his fingertips wiped the tears from Shan Yu’s face, before he could even pull his hand back, the next stream of tears had already slid from the corners of his eyes.
After waving his hand up and down several times like a conductor leading an orchestra, he finally made a decision. “I’ll get you some tissues.”
As he turned to get tissues for Shan Yu from the coffee table, Shan Yu grabbed his arm, pulled him back, and then hugged him tightly.
He bowed his head, pressing his eyes into his shoulder.
Chen Jian quickly hugged him back, patting and then gently stroking his back.
This was probably the only comforting gesture he knew. When he was little and unhappy or sick, his mother would comfort him this way.
Now, when Xiao Dou’er cried, or when Mushroom wouldn’t sleep, this was his go-to move.
He didn’t know any others.
If he had known Shan Yu would cry, and cry like this, he would have at least learned another set of moves…
Shan Yu cried very quietly, almost without a sound. As Chen Jian’s hand stroked his back, he could occasionally feel his body tremble slightly.
A few minutes later, Shan Yu lifted his head, finally making a tiny sound.
He sniffled.
“I’m going to wash my face,” Shan Yu said.
“Okay,” Chen Jian nodded and glanced at him.
Shan Yu’s eyes and nose were red, and his face was covered in tears.
He subconsciously touched his own shoulder; it was soaked.
“You should change out of that shirt and wash it,” Shan Yu said as he walked towards the sink.
“No need,” Chen Jian said. “You can’t wash a down jacket all the time, it won’t be as warm.”
“You’re not very particular, are you,” Shan Yu glanced back at him.
“I’m someone who’s slept on the carpet twice,” Chen Jian said.
Shan Yu smiled.
By the time he came out after washing his face, Chen Jian had wiped the spot on his shoulder with a wet wipe. They were tears, after all, and would leave a mark if not wiped.
If Sanbing saw it, he would definitely ask.
Chen Jian, did Mushroom bite you too?
Yes, and left a shoulder full of drool…
Shan Yu opened the fridge, took out a can of Coke, tilted his head back and took two gulps, then walked over to stand in front of the reptile enclosure.
“Did you buy food for it?” Shan Yu asked.
“I bought mealworms,” Chen Jian got up and walked over. “I asked Tang Rui, since he’s always fishing. You can get them at the bait and tackle shop in town.”
“Mm,” Shan Yu smiled. “You’ve got it all figured out, huh?”
“I didn’t ask about much else, mainly just wanted to know where to conveniently buy worms. The shop owner’s friend originally wanted to teach me how to raise it, afraid I wouldn’t do a good job and wanted me to switch to an easier one,” Chen Jian reported in one breath. “But then he heard that you raised your old one from a hatchling, so he didn’t teach me.”
“Thank you,” Shan Yu put his arm on his shoulder, then brought his hand back, his fingertips gently hooking his chin.
“Should we give it a name?” Chen Jian lowered his head and nibbled on his fingertip.
“Let’s call him Er Ge (Second Brother),” Shan Yu said. “Is it a male?”
“Yes,” Chen Jian said, nibbling on his finger and nodding.
“Have you fed it these past two days?” Shan Yu asked.
“I didn’t feed it the first two days. I fed it yesterday, and this morning too,” Chen Jian said. “It just eats whenever I feed it, so I don’t dare to feed it too much, afraid it’ll overeat.”
“You even buy a gecko with the same appetite as yourself,” Shan Yu smiled, then stood watching for a while longer. He took a mealworm from a nearby box with tongs and placed it in front of Er Ge.
Er Ge, in its usual state, chomped it down in one bite.
“It feels like it’s smiling whenever it eats,” Chen Jian said.
“Eating makes everyone happy,” Shan Yu glanced at him.
“What,” Chen Jian looked back at him. “Do I smile when I eat too?”
Shan Yu laughed and said nothing.
“Should I buy some crickets?” Chen Jian asked. “I saw you used to feed Da Ge crickets. The owner said this one has been fed mealworms since it was little and is used to it.”
“Either is fine. If it eats mealworms, we’ll just stick with that for now, they’re easy to buy,” Shan Yu said. “If you want to improve its diet, you can go catch crickets in the spring.”
“…I’ll buy them for Er Ge,” Chen Jian said.
Shan Yu smiled and pinched his cheek. “This tank and Er Ge, how much did you spend?”
“Not much,” Chen Jian said. “I can afford it. I budgeted for it, setting aside the money for the two loans I have to pay back before the New Year.”
Shan Yu didn’t say anything. He turned and lay down on the sofa, pillowing his head on his arm. After a moment of silence, he spoke. “I started raising Da Ge when I was in middle school. I was renting a place back then, and the landlord was a reptile enthusiast. The room next to mine was full of geckos.”
Chen Jian walked over and sat on the sofa, leaning against his legs.
“He was the one who gave me Da Ge,” Shan Yu smiled.
“You rented a place by yourself in middle school?” Chen Jian glanced at him.
“Yeah,” Shan Yu replied. “My home was far from school, so I rented a place next to the school.”
Chen Jian didn’t speak. He felt that Shan Yu’s life as a teenager was something he couldn’t imagine. Looking at his Moments, he seemed to have many friends, but you could still feel that he was very lonely.
Loneliness is something that’s in the heart.
“They say reptiles don’t have emotions like cats and dogs,” Shan Yu closed his eyes. “But back then, every time I came home, Da Ge would come out and watch me. Sometimes he’d watch me all night. I’d talk to him, and I felt like he could understand.”
“You talked to it, you fed it,” Chen Jian said. “At the very least, it knew you were the best to it.”
“Yeah,” Shan Yu replied. “When I couldn’t sleep at night, it would be active. It kept me company on many nights. Other than being a picky eater, it had no flaws.”
Chen Jian smiled.
“When I found out I was going to jail, my first reaction was, what about Da Ge,” Shan Yu said. “Yue Lang wasn’t in the country that year, so I could only give him to Liu Wu. Even though Liu Wu had never raised one before, I knew he would try his best to learn how…”
“Why…” Chen Jian looked at him, hesitated for a moment, but still got up and sat on the carpet in front of the sofa as he had before, leaning against it. “…didn’t you ask your parents to help raise it?”
“When you’re in that much trouble, how can you have the nerve,” Shan Yu’s hand came over his chest, as it had before, and held him. “Besides, I… I didn’t want them to think that at a time like that, I had nothing to say to them, but cared so much about a little thing.”
“Were you afraid they’d think your feelings for a gecko were deeper than for them?” Chen Jian tilted his head back, resting it on his waist.
“Yeah,” Shan Yu sighed softly. “He was eleven when he died. Normally, he should have lived a few more years. Liu Wu had practically become an expert in gecko care, but he still got sick… I think he had feelings. He probably thought I didn’t want him anymore… Liu Wu said he would still come out and stare into space every night, maybe he was waiting for me…”
Chen Jian took his hand and kissed his wrist.
“When Liu Wu told me Da Ge died, I was truly, very, very sad,” Shan Yu said softly, his voice slightly nasal. “I felt incredibly sorry for him.”
Chen Jian now understood why Shan Yu had such a strong reaction when he saw this gecko.
“Tissue,” Shan Yu said.
“Huh?” Chen Jian paused for a moment before realizing what he meant. He grabbed a tissue from the coffee table and passed it back to him.
Shan Yu pressed the tissue to his eyes.
“I’ll tell you a secret,” Shan Yu said.
“Okay,” Chen Jian quickly pressed his ear to his cheek.
“In those years, at least on the surface, my feelings for Da Ge were indeed deeper than for my parents,” Shan Yu said. “I was probably used to a life without them.”
Chen Jian didn’t speak.
“Don’t let my mom and the others know,” Shan Yu said.
“How would I dare!” Chen Jian said in a hushed voice. After a moment, he rested his head on Shan Yu’s waist again. “Maybe it’s not that your feelings for Da Ge were deeper. It’s that you put a lot of your feelings onto Da Ge, and a part of that was your feelings for your parents.”
Shan Yu was silent for a long time before turning his head to look at him. “Chen Jian, you really are like someone who’s cultivated in the mountains for twenty years.”
“Not twenty years. I only started cultivating after my mom passed away,” Chen Jian said.
Shan Yu smiled.
“Did you have any pets when you were little?” he asked.
“Does a duck count?” Chen Jian asked.
“Why don’t you ask if a pig counts,” Shan Yu said.
“It wasn’t raised to be sold or eaten,” Chen Jian said. “My mom took me to the old town, and at the market, there was a little duckling that someone had thrown away because it was very weak. I picked it up.”
“Did you raise it?” Shan Yu asked.
“Yeah,” Chen Jian nodded. “It was like a goose. It would follow me around, and when it couldn’t keep up, it would quack.”
Shan Yu laughed. “Isn’t that just like Mushroom?”
“Right,” Chen Jian nodded.
“Did it have a name?” Shan Yu asked.
“Chen Yaya (Chen Duckduck),” Chen Jian answered with a straight face.
“Why…” Shan Yu couldn’t help but turn his head away and laugh. “It even has a surname.”
Chen Jian clicked his tongue. “Doesn’t your gecko have the surname Shan, then? Shan Da Ge?”
“Fuck,” Shan Yu laughed even harder. “I was sleepy, but you’ve completely woken me up.”
“Then I’ll talk about something else.” Chen Jian thought for a moment. “I also had a cat, but I can’t really say I raised it. It was a kitten from another family’s cat in the village; no one fed it, so it always came to my house to eat.”
“Was its name Chen Maomao (Chen Catcat)?” Shan Yu asked with a smile.
“You… do you want to sleep or not?” Chen Jian glanced at him.
“Sleep.” Shan Yu closed his eyes. “You talk.”
“Its name was Chen Xiaomao (Chen Littlecat),” Chen Jian said.
“Damn you,” Shan Yu burst out laughing.
“Chen Xiaomao had a feud with Chen Yaya.” Chen Jian ignored him and continued in a low voice. “Every time it came, it would fight Chen Yaya. Chen Yaya might have had some goose blood in it, it wasn’t scared at all. It would fight back every time…”
The cat and the duck fought for several years and never managed to get along. They fought on sight, right up until the duck died of old age.
After the duck died, the cat didn’t come to his house as often.
Later, the house was gone, and he didn’t know where the cat went. Even though they lived in the same village, Chen Jian never saw Chen Xiaomao again.
After finishing the saga of the duck and cat’s feud, Shan Yu’s arm on his shoulder was completely relaxed, and his breathing was slow and even. He was clearly asleep.
Chen Jian carefully moved his hand back onto the sofa and went into the bedroom to get a blanket to cover Shan Yu.
Given Shan Yu’s sleeping habits, this spot shouldn’t have a sofa; it should be replaced with a bed.
Or a sofa bed.
But Chen Jian remembered the price of this sofa—a full-grain leather sofa filled with down, over sixty thousand yuan. A decent fabric sofa bed could be bought for about six hundred…
That eight-thousand-yuan chair was still in the storage room. The entire Pigsty Gang had taken turns trying to fix it, but it was still broken. Lao Si was even planning to take it home during the New Year to let his dad, who was a fitter, take a look.
Standing by the sofa, his thoughts drifting, Chen Jian made sure Shan Yu was completely asleep before quietly slipping out of the office.
He had a practice session with his instructor in the afternoon. This was the last lesson before his Subject Three test; the next time would be to familiarize himself with the test site.
“Want me to drive you?” Sun Nana asked.
“I can just take the motorcycle,” Chen Jian said. “In case President He’s group needs anything, there has to be a reliable person around. We have a lot of guests now, Panpan definitely can’t handle it alone.”
“Is Shan Yu not reliable?” Sun Nana smiled.
“He’s asleep,” Chen Jian said. “Probably won’t wake up until evening.”
“Got it,” Sun Nana said with a smile, tidying her hair.
“We’ll have a short meeting tonight,” Chen Jian said. “Everyone who’s free should attend. Around nine, it should be less busy then.”
“Okay, I’ll let them know,” Sun Nana nodded.
As he rode the motorcycle out, Chen Jian made a special detour to the garden’s back gate to look at the newly arrived old car.
The cars driven by the owners of the other guesthouses inside were not as good as Shan Yu’s. They were mostly in the several hundred thousand yuan range. The best was probably Boss Yang’s BMW, which he heard was around nine hundred thousand.
And it was a small sports car, not as big as this one.
“Going to practice driving?” Big Li came out from the next courtyard.
“Yeah,” Chen Jian replied.
“Is this car for you?” Big Li asked.
“How could that be,” Chen Jian smiled. “It’s the boss’s car.”
“So you’ll drive that one after you get your license?” Big Li asked again.
“Yeah,” Chen Jian nodded.
“Boss Shan is really something,” Big Li remarked with a sigh.
Chen Jian didn’t say anything more and rode off on his motorcycle.
He was afraid that if he stayed any longer, Big Li would tell him he wanted to switch jobs.
We don’t hire people with too many schemes.
After all, the simple-minded were the majority at Dayin.
During the few days President He’s group was there, their schedule was packed. It was clear the travel agency was trying to get a head start. There were already a lot of guests, and with all the pre-New Year tasks, Chen Jian felt like he was walking constantly—back and forth, up and down, in and out.
He passed his Subject Three test in one go and didn’t even realize it until he got back to the inn, at which point he suddenly became ecstatic.
“Let’s go, let’s go,” he paced back and forth in the office. “Take me to that road by the old quarry to try driving. I took a look on my way back on the motorcycle, there are no people or cars.”
“Looking at you, people would think you already have your license,” Shan Yu said.
“I can get it in a week,” Chen Jian held up one finger. “One week. I can get it on the 27th of the last lunar month. I checked, they’re working that day, so I can go pick it up.”
“You can pick up your dad on the way,” Shan Yu said. “You drive.”
“My dad would be scared to death,” Chen Jian laughed.
“And then take your dad on a tour of all your relatives’ houses,” Shan Yu said.
“You still remember that?” Chen Jian was taken aback.
“Of course I remember,” Shan Yu said. “Did you think I was just saying it?”
“My dad would definitely not do it,” Chen Jian said.
“Then you go,” Shan Yu said.
“For real?” Chen Jian looked at him. He kind of wanted to do it, and even felt a strange sense of excitement, but also thought it was too crazy.
“For real,” Shan Yu said.
“Won’t it be a bit…” Chen Jian hesitated.
“Crazy?” Shan Yu said. “You’ve been cautiously cultivating for twenty years. What’s wrong with being crazy once?”
“Even after cultivating for twenty years, I still haven’t managed to cultivate a peaceful mindset,” Chen Jian sighed.
“Why do you need to be so peaceful?” Shan Yu grabbed the car keys and walked out of the office. “You’re not dead.”
“It’s almost the New Year, be more auspicious!” Chen Jian followed him.
“Why do you need to be so peaceful,” Shan Yu said. “We’re all living people.”
The road to the quarry had been abandoned for a long time. The roadside was covered in withered grass, but the road surface was still flat.
Shan Yu stopped the car on the side of the road and got out.
“Actually, it would have been fine to practice with the other car,” Chen Jian also got out. “This one, what if…”
“You remembered to say that now that we’re here,” Shan Yu walked to the back of the car and opened the trunk. “Then let’s go back and switch cars now.”
“Never mind,” Chen Jian said with a smile.
“Come here,” Shan Yu said.
Chen Jian walked to the back of the car.
In the trunk was a small red box.
“A gift for you,” Shan Yu said. “A New Year’s gift.”
Although he knew it was probably a hat—he had seen the yarn in the bedroom every time he went to the office these past few days, and Shan Yu hadn’t hidden it.
But when the gift box was actually placed in front of him, Chen Jian was so excited his hands trembled.
“It’s been about ten years,” Chen Jian said as he held the box, trying to open the lid, but his hands were shaking so much that he failed to lift it twice. “since I’ve received a New Year’s gift, other than Xiao Dou’er’s cards…”
Shan Yu grabbed his hands and helped him open the lid. “Then try on this once-in-a-decade New Year’s hat.”
